We’re showing you a picture of Speedy Gonzales because this story is just as racist as the character…and to show you that we still have a LONG way to go before we — as Latinos, and as Americans — can say we’re living in a “post-racial society.”
The state that gave us the Great and Estimable George W. Bush is at it again…this time armed with the claim that los Mexicanos males are invading our Great and Estimable South Texas ranches in an effort towards Reconquista.
In a story featured on Digger’s Realm, “the bloodbath continues along our southern border and now word is coming in that Los Zetas, the highly trained killers formerly with the Gulf Cartel, have crossed into the United States and taken over at least two ranches in the Laredo, Texas area. I am receiving word that the owners of the ranches have evacuated without being harmed. The source is law enforcement in the area.”
Now, it should be noted: in Texas, “law enforcement” means “anyone with a 10-gallon hat and a rifle.”
Unfortunately for the Local Yokels, this story is completely and utterly false. According to a follow up story, law enforcement was bombarded with calls from across the country Saturday asking about a report that the Zetas had taken over two ranches off Mines Road.
But officials with the Laredo Police Department, Webb County Sheriff’s Department and Border Patrol said they knew nothing about such an incident, while Erik Vasys, an FBI spokesman in San Antonio, said the agency does not comment on rumors.
The Digger’s Real blogger wrote that he got a tip from a San Diego, Calif., minuteman named Jeff Schwilk, who said that the Zetas, former enforcers of the Gulf Cartel, had crossed into the United States and taken over two ranches off Mines Road, about 10 miles northwest of Interstate 35.
From all of this, we predict the following. One: within a year, a group of Brazilian tourists in Orlando will be attacked as a roving Mexican street gang. Two: we will see a roughly 1 million percent rise in in the number of Tea Party YouTube videos using clips from The Expendables to simulate an elite commando group killing half of Mexico. None of them will be racist (of course), and the ones that are will secretly be made by MoveOn.org.